My Life is A Drama Free Zone

I didn't want to see spring until August anyway.

We got hammered good with a freezing rain storm on Monday. We got absolutely dumped by snow on Wednesday. Upwards of 30 CM in town, here. And we're expecting a crapload more over the next day or so.

A STORM IS CURRENTLY OVER WEST VIRGINIA THIS MORNING AND WILL PUSH
NORTHWARD TODAY GIVING SIGNIFICANT SNOW TO MOST OF SOUTHERN ONTARIO.

THE FIRST ROUND BEGAN FRIDAY MORNING OVER AREAS NORTH OF THE LOWER

GREAT LAKES AND LAST EVENING ACROSS EASTERN ONTARIO AND SKI COUNTRY.

THE NIAGARA PENINSULA AND OTTAWA HAVE ALREADY RECEIVED NEAR 20

CENTIMETRES AS OF 9 AM. THE SECOND ROUND OF HEAVY SNOWFALL IS NOW

RAPIDLY SPREADING ACROSS THE REGIONS. KEEP IN MIND THAT THE ENTIRE

SNOWFALL DURATION WILL BE ABOUT 36 HOURS BUT THE HEAVIEST SNOW WILL

BE THIS AFTERNOON INTO THIS EVENING.

STORM TOTALS WILL LIKELY BE NEAR 30 CENTIMETRES ALONG AND EAST OF A

LINE FROM LONDON TO LAKE SIMCOE THEN TO PETAWAWA. THERE IS POTENTIAL

FOR 40 TO 50 CENTIMETRES OF SNOW FROM THE NIAGARA PENINSULA THROUGH

TRENTON TO OTTAWA BY THE TIME THIS STORM SYSTEM MOVES OUT.

Thank god I don't have to shovel the crap, but still. Methinks someone really, really hates me…

Tool outages are your friend.

Particularly when they mean you've only had to troubleshoot and actually fix maybe 2 or 3 calls all freakin' day, and it's now 2:30 in the afternoon. Ladies and gents, somebody up there loves me, methinks.

I think winter's getting to someone...

A few months back, they started making it mandatory in Ottawa that the bus drivers call out the stops as they come to them. Most of them do so, and the others probably won't be working there for very long. The driver I was stuck with this morning though, oh my. There's calling out the bus stops, and there's having way too much freakin' fun with a microphone. He was doing entirely the latter. I think, now that I actually have time to think about it, I might have seen him on YouTube…

Is today the national day of malware or something?

Only explanation I can think of for the reason every call, except maybe 1 or 2, has been a badly messed up system in desperate need of a serious cleaning. If I really wanted to play dirty, I could probably break the single-person record for amount of times reinstalling Windows in a typical day at the office. Ah well, on the bright side, by the time I get off lunch I'll only have maybe 2 hours left. I can drag a call or few out long enough to cover it I'm sure…

Now there's a random search woops.

I think Google may have had a momentary laps. A Dell technician in India has, apparently, stumbled across this entry while looking for a solution to one of I'm sure a meriad of Sympatico related problems. Particularly surrounding Windows Mail. Now, uh, don't get me wrong–I like the attention, but that's got nothing to do with that particular entry. Oops. Ah well, hopefully it's the same idiot I was talking to shortly before writing that entry. Now there's open feedback for ya.

I can haz no webmessengerz?

So apparently they've gotten smart and blocked all the good web to IM services out there. I didn't want a way to kill a lunch hour anyway. Anyone have an alternative to things like meebo, MSN's web messenger, ebudy and… um, all those? Will pay in… um, praise. 'Cuz that's all I gots.

If you're stuck on hold, I'm sorry.

Very rarely will I make 2 work related posts in one day. Not because I don't like my job, but because I'm too lazy. But today–oh, today… there are 23 people currently waiting on hold. One of them, the one I'll probably get to talk to when my break ends, has been waiting for almost 20 minutes already. And it's not even noon yet…

So yesterday was apparently senior citizens' day?

So this week's work routine started off as per usual at 7:00 or so on Wednesday. And… got very different after that. A guy I work with got shown the door due to cost cutting measures, or so that's what the rumor mill says anyway. So as of that afternoon, I'm back making regular use of Ottawa's ever so very lovely transit system. So yesterday, I get on in the morning as I suspect I'll be doing for the foreseeable future, and the bus I take to actually get me to work just so happens to be driven by one of the older gentlemen on staff. Which, okay, I'm all for that. I mean, hell, I like the idea in Ontario that you can actually keep right on working 'til you damn well don't wanna. But in certain cases, like yesterday morning… he really should have not wanted to. Harsh-ish? Yeah quite probably. But true. So I catch his bus at 6:00 yesterday morning. It's a pretty straight forward route–through the busy part of Kanata, down a couple back roads, loop around and come back up pretty much up the street from where I work. So my plan was to get off at the corner and just walk from there to work. It wasn't *too* freezing cold yesterday, so I could get away with it. Well, if the moron didn't flat out miss my stop. So rather than be half an hour early for work, I ended up being rather half an hour late. And that's not one of those buses where you can just get off at some random stop and catch one going the opposite direction in 5-10 minutes. There's one bus an hour, it goes one direction, and if you miss where you have to get off, you get to go around again. So I got to go around again. And because it was his last run on that route, I got to go back to the original stop where he picked me up from, call my boss to tell him I'd be late, and hop *another* bus to work. Pretty pretty. But not really. And then coming home after work, I had the pleasure of being driven home by another senior citizen. Who also missed my stop going back. That one, at least, decided it'd be better if he just dropped me off at the halfway point so I wouldn't have as long to wait to catch the second one I need. So I still didn't get home too insanely late last night, all things considered. Pissed me right off though, for sure. And of course this morning, senior citizen number 1 was behind the wheel again when I caught that bus, so to say the least, I wasn't exactly bursting with confidence. But, um, I'm here. And I was here on time this morning. And I didn't kill anyone. But I'm not all that thrilled about the prospect of the return trip. And people might die on that one.

Bad things happen when you can't sleep.

For instance, you spend 3 hours before you have to go to work getting rid of a couple hundred spam comments on your blog. Or maybe that's just me. That's also a distinct possibility. Spammification sucks.

I hate to say I told you so, but...

Well, okay, so I don't. And I did. There's no real such thing as "medicinal marijuana", there never was, and there never will be. And this is only really proven by a supreme court decision that, really, should never have had to happen. But, thank you again, Steven Harper, for reminding me why it is I believe you should be taken out back, tied to a tree next to George Bush, and shot. According to this article, users of "medicinal marijuana" can now actually pick their own grower. Now, how in the hell they intend to enforce something like that in a way that the government can still have its fingers all over it is beyond me, but to me, it sounds an aweful lot like "Buy from whoever you want, and have fun doing it.". Which, okay, I can see the point of it from a constitutional point of view, but still–bad, bad move. Never mind stupid, stupid move. Forever ago, I went on my own mini rant on the subject, after a discussion on a blindness related mailing list I'm a part of–the email that prompted that one was also quoted in the linked entry. I won't just plain up and say it's ridiculous–primarily because really, if you have half a brain, you don't need me to say it. But from the brief look at the outlines points in the judge's ruling, it very much does sound like a choose your dealer type of situation. And I still maintain the opinion that, next to the entire decision to actually allow the idea of medicinal marijuana, this is quite possibly *the* worst decision our dear court system could come up with. It makes me cringe to say it, but I really hope the government decides to appeal this one. For a change, I actually like their idea better. Which… mostly means I dislike it less. But, I suppose if I had to pick between two crappy poker hands…

December roughly translated is holy crap it's busy?

Between work, Christmas shopping, and the general insanity that is my life around about this time every year, not surprisingly I've managed a grand total of like 2.5 attempts at entries on this here blog in this here month. I finished my shopping for Christmas about a week or so before, so the only thing I had to really worry about was resisting the urge to take overtime–part of me wonders if that would have been less stressful. Aside from that, they had me doing some testing for work so I can see how much I don't qualify for a bump up in pay grade. But the topper was over christmas. There are actually people in my family who were fooled into believing my sister-in-law had changed. Her clothes, maybe, but that's about it.

Speaking of Christmas, though… people have got to stop hanging out inside my head. It's unhealthy. For everyone. My parents bought me, in no particular order, a new TV, a couple cordless phones, Garth Brooks's newest CD, a new sweater, and things I'm leaving out because i'm too lazy, don't remember, don't want to think, or some weird and wonderful combination of all of the above. It bordered on awesome. So I came back home yesterday, hooked up the new TV, watched part of the game (writeup on that one if I remember when I get home), and then stuck Short Circuit (another christmas gift) into the only thing we could get to play a DVD last night–my ever so kick ass computer system. Ironicly enough it was during that that I decided next year, I'm staying the hell in Ottawa. And it was before that that I decided, with a tiny bit of encouragement from Trish, that I don't plan to be sober come new years night. Oh darn. And All I can really say is I hope 2008 is half as eventful. I couldn't handle 2007's equal in that department. *flops over tiredly*

This is where I check out.

I have no idea why I think of about 3/4 of the things I do. But apparently some random part of me finds it amusing. I will seak help immediately.

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Winter storm warning for: City of Ottawa">
Someone tell me they can see why I seriously thought about the possibility of not going to work today. Although granted, the predictions were worse yesterday. It's still nothing anyone should ever have to be out in, never mind have to go to work in. Bleh.

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I think I'm managing to come down with my first winter cold. And a week before Christmas. Go me. At this rate I should be half dead by new years.

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I thought we were supposed to suck this year? The team I'm beginning to love to hate has started pulling themselves together. And I was just beginning to accept another season of golf…

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Conrad Black officially makes less than me. According to this storry (thank you, CTV), he'll be making 12 cents an hour in prison. See, I'd complain, but what expenses has he got there? His food and housing's paid for. Besides, he made enough money breaking the law, he can afford to lose some following it.

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If anyone ever has to know why it is I absolutely despise vista, just try and set up file/printer sharing. You will pull your hair out. I nearly wanted to… thank god today's my Friday. Oh. My. Lord. Good thing I'm not easy to piss off.

*****************

Another spyware call. Another bloody mac user/windows newbie. Wonder how long I can drag this call out before people start pointing fingers at me. Anyone taking bets?

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And lastly, mother nature, please and thank you kindly, stop it with the freakin' white stuff. It's bad enough I get to freeze my ass off on the way to work. Again, bleh. Nature sucks.

Why I don't go by 'Jim'.

My father and I both have the same name. So to make it less of a headache on both of us, he goes by Jim, and I go by James. And where the legal, given name is required, one of us will usually stick our middle initial in there as well–which, admitedly, can also be problematic given as that's also the same. In 24 years, I've never willingly answered to Jim–willingly, of course, meaning that there are always those few people who just don't really care either way and call me whatever comes to mind. So when I got a phone call this morning asking for 'Jim', I was admitedly a little confused/irritated. He asked for him by last name, too, so sure, I figured it was going to be for either me or my father–if it's for the latter they pulled the number out of the wrong phone book. I still have no idea who this guy is, and then he mentions that I did a job for him a while back on behalf of the ministry of labour. By this time I've gone from general curiosity to "Zuh?". Okay, so now he's not looking for me *or* my father. Now how do we get him out of *that* awkward situation? worst of it is, he called from a Toronto number, so he just paid Bell Canada some coin to be told to try again. I almost felt sorry for the guy, but… then I figured, I needed some amusement. And that was it. I gotta get a life…

Oh. My. Lord.

I don't know whether to be extatic or frightened. So I'm a little of both instead. There was, at one point this afternoon, 63 people available to take calls. Even now, less than 5 minutes later, there still sits 54 available. If I'm lucky, I'll take *maybe* one call before I have to check out. Lovin' it.

You know what they say about rules...

A 23-year-old college student who got told she couldn't wear a revealing outfit aboard Southwest Airlines sure knows. She went and put even less on Playboy. Just goes to prove, tell someone they can't, and they'll just make it worse. Anyone who told these people negative reinforcement works should probably have been shot. On the bright side, it gave me something to read while on this call…

Would you pay to tube?

Techdirt saves me from being completely and totally bored out of my frickin frackin mind! Talk of the prospect of paying for YouTube content has, quite possibly again, made its presence known. And to this, I can only say… um, why? If it's on YouTube, it's because people don't *want* advertisements. Or maybe that's just my messed up opinion–that's a possibility, too! I know fer sure I'd avoid it like the plague if they stuck ads up there. Hell, I might be tempted to launch my own video site. Or at least get all my hillarity from BitTorrent. Kinda like I already do most of my TV watching. Oops, did I say that outloud? Quick, call the MPAA–lock me away before my horrible horrible influence spreads! Too late.

Maybe I live on the wrong side of the border to understand, but...

Is it really worth giving someone a detension and getting their parents involved just for hugging someone goodbye? I know it's been a while since I was in highschool, but so far as I know that was still acceptible. Yes? No? Maybe so? Does someone living in the US want to maybe correct this apparently misguided young man? Any volunteers?

Wherein my opinion of relying on other people gets more confirmation it doesn't need.

So remember when I was looking forward to the day shift because I could catch the decent buses going to and from work? Well apparently, they neglected to make that the case on Saturdays. Now, Sundays is understandable–bus service sucks on a good day then anyway. But I distinctly recall seeing that there was a bus running this morning, at the usual 5:20 or 5:21 time slot, just as it did on a normal day. So, silly little me goes out and freezes his ass off waiting for said bus to show up. 5:45 gets here, and… yup, still no bus. Now, ordinarily I wouldn't particularly care–just go to the next stop and catch another bus that's heading in the same general direction, and I'll meet up with my transfer on the other end. Except the only other bus running that early? One that leaves at… you guessed it, 5:46 in the morning. And that particular bus stop is a 20 minute walk from my house, and from the stop I was currently standing at-. 25 if I decided I couldn't be bothered to cut through my building to get there–it's freezing cold. Yeah freaking right. So thanks to OC Transpo misinforming me, my shift was a writeoff before I got out the door. The end result? A phone call in sick, an explanation to my manager of all of 4 days that I did not, in fact, decide to take a Saturday off whether I had one or not, and… I get to enjoy an unplanned Saturday off. Which, okay, can't complain about that. But it would have been nice to have actually planned that unplanned Saturday off, rather than OC Transpo deciding that I didn't want to go to work anyway. Well, I guess on the bright side, I can get some housework done around here. Eventually. Meaning… just as soon as I figure out whether or not I want to go grab a couple more hours' sleep. It's not like I don't have the option now.

So there's this idiot brother...

I thought I could avoid it. I thought after he got pissed off with her and cancelled the wedding, that'd be it. Then they got back together, but swore they weren't going to try to get married again–always room, then, to call it quits before one of them winds up in jail for murder. So the bomb shell that got dropped a couple days ago just now means this family's screwed. He and my once again future bitch-in-law are, after all, getting married. And I can only say this time, I'm not taking the time off work for it–I can't. I took my last bit of vacation time for their first attempt. They're not coming back to Pembroke for it, it looks like. Which… actually suits me just fine, really. Less of a chance I can attend, then. I saw her all of twice, maybe 3 times since the wedding that never happened. And my opinion of her hasn't changed all that much–she's still an immature bitch. Marrying her will probably cut his life in half faster than any millitary asignment overseas, but… heh, I could never accuse him of being all that bright. A little backwards, maybe–he's from Pembroke, it's expected. Ah well, this this much milage between us and both of us working the hours we are, at least I don't have to talk to his again fiance and again soon-to-be bride/bitch. Hm, on the other hand, I don't really feel sorry for the guy, either–he brought this one on himself. Twice. I still hope they never have kids.

My Facebook resistance has gone right to hell.

I blame family, who have managed to invite me to said website for… whatever sick and twisted reasons they do have. I have no idea how much, if at all, I'll actually use the thing, but… eh. It's free. And relatively brain cell killing. And if I'm gonna mock it, I suppose I'd best figure out what it is I'm mocking. So facebook it is. Gawd, I'm probably gonna regret that…

Dell: we'll help you with your porn, too.

I've sunk to a new low. Guy calls in because he can't access a certain website. that website just so happens to be worldsex.com, and the reason is his own stupidity. for the record, searching for worldsex.com on google will not, in fact, always reveal that particular website. typing the address where it's actually supposed to go, however, will. computer license. Revoked. Immediately. Gawd, sometimes, I can't believe they pay me to do this.

Can we vote for a law against morons in power now?

And they wonder why people don't speak up when shit happens. The Western University of Oregon, in a brilliant act of absolute unrivaled genius, came about *that* close to expelling a student for violating one of the university's policies. And, for the record, it was a policy that basicly said if a student was found to have accessed confidencial information that was *accidentally* left in a publicly accessible area of the network, the student would be responsible for it and thus have to take the fall. Now, keep in mind the only reason he was known to actually have the information was because he reported it. Do I *really* have to explain how stupid, backwards, and outright brainless that is? The idiot factor of this dumbass move makes it perhaps the most hillarious thing I've posted on here. Ever. If… you find retarded policies and the morons that enforce them hillarious. Of course, if not, there's always other websites–Google's full of 'em. But still, the way I see it, the university has preetty much just told this kid, look, yes we screwed up. But you're not getting paid–you're expendable. If it were me, I'd certainly think twice about reporting anything else I accidentally discover. Just in case they've got a policy against that, too. How much you wanna bet even though they didn't expell him, he doesn't catch it good in the end anyway? That's the danger of technology, I guess–there will always be someone there who doesn't have a clue how it works, and blames everything on people doing what they're not supposed to be doing just because they fucked up in the first place. And I get paid to talk to some of them. Somebody save me.

I get to do nothing for 4 more hours. Plus breaks.

And all because of a collective clusterfuck that means my entire team misses out on 4.5 hours of training tonight. So now, until 2:00 in the morning at the earliest, barring a natural disaster–they taught us very early in the initial session about the speed of Dell–I get to sit here with my thumb up my ass, doing absolutely nothing except cruising teh interwebs until one of 3 things happen. we get really extremely uberly busy and they tell us they need us on the phones, one or more of us decide we're tired of sitting here and getting paid to not do work–for the record, I so won't be one of those–or plans get changed/reworked/fucked over in such a way that someone higher up than my manager realizes, hey wait a minute, training's been cancelled and there wasn't anything sent out about that. Of course, for the record, I don't think there's anyone higher than my manager so far as this department goes even in the building at the moment. Or there won't be in about an hour and a half. so unless he does a complete 180 on letting us just kinda chill it for a few hours, we're all good 'til 2:00 or 2:30. I love this job. Or maybe it's just the manager. That's a possibility. I'll take it either way.

Should I be worried...?

Either a lot of people really don't like their jobs, or… well… we have other problems. It's only been a couple days, but so far my newest website tool (by the way, thankya much, Mike!) has me just a little tiny bit, um… worried. this entry's has been getting an aweful lot of attention… Mommy, I'm scared…

BRAINS!!!!!!!

You thought it was only in movies. Well, okay, so maybe you're a natural conspiracy theorist and… didn't think that. either way… this is sure no sciense fiction. And all I have to say is… uh, owwy. Owwy owwy owwy. Talk about your holy brain disease, Batman. Killer amoebas–they're comin' to get you. Don't swim in the water…

Even Dell technicians hate Dell technicians. And Sympatico, and Microsoft, and...

Welp, as some of you know and others of you guessed I'm sure by now, the formerly Vista and now XP computer is up and running. Well, partially. No wireless network support and there's still a rather lengthy list of devices Windows doesn't have drivers for. But I'm slowly piecing that together. Now, here's why every time I have to call tech support, I cringe. And not because I am one. So I call up Del on Monday, because their support site doesn't have a driver for my built-in wireless card. Not for XP, at least–which, okay, no big deal; it came with Vista, after all. So I check the Vista drivers list, like I've been doing with a few other things, and there's none listed there. So I just flat out asked the technician I spoke to on Monday, "does this machine even come with a driver for the wireless card?" Honest question, and a simple enough yes or no question to be sure–if I were sitting on the *other* end of that conversation, I could have probably told myself one way or another in about a minute and a half. But, not with this guy, who first wanted to spend 5 minutes making *sure* I wasn't a moron calling up with the misguided belief that, because I got this new fangled desktop thing sitting in my living room, it automaticly comes with a wireless card. Did I mention I pointed out to him at least once I'm employed with Dell, doing things like network troubleshooting on a daily basis? So I know when a computer's supposed to come with a wireless card–like, say, when in your order information, it says that one was specificly requested. So, we get by that round about, and he finally decides he actually wants to varify whether or not it does. So he tells me to go to their support site–I guess he wasn't listening when I said I've already been there and they don't have it. He finally just decides to put me on hold and do some "research"–for the record, when a hardware tech says they're doing some research, you know they're asking one of their l2's if this is a good enough reason to transfer them to the Dell on Call department. About 20 minutes go by, and he comes back, saying he can't find the wireless card on my system. Insert long, exasperated, frustrated sigh, and me telling him, yet again, that it doesn't give a brand name in the order details, but, and this is where I think I drive the point home that I work for the same company, I tell him the training material *should* say what brand the wireless card option includes for my particular model of computer. Silence. Then he asks to put me on hold again. Another few minutes go by. Presumeably, more "research". Then he comes back, says he thinks he found the brand and model of the wireless card, the exact details I honestly don't remember–for the record, when a technician says "I think", it's never pretty–and tells me that it looks like the support for that particular model is built directly into Vista. And there are no drivers for XP. So, not wanting to argue the point, I hang up, and plug that particular model into the almighty goog. And sure enough, inside of 10 minutes, I could have called that particular technician a liar. But… rather than openly and blatantly advertising the obvious, I just dinked around a bit, installed a few things I needed to install, and called it a night–I had to work the next night, and it was 5:00 or later in the morning before I finally decided to fall into bed. So it got to sit there until tonight, when I ended up not going to work–thank you, public transportation, for showing up early and thus making me miss the only bus that'd actually get me there before I was well into my shift. So I go back to that computer, figuring if the support is built into one version of Windows, the other version should have *something*. So I do a little fiddling, and sure enough, one wireless driver, for windows XP, located and installed. What was that you were saying about it was only designed to work with Vista? Now, the problem comes up that it's telling me to make sure the actual card's turned on. Now, they have a funky little keyboard command where you can do that for laptops, but I wasn't sure about this particular desktop. Cringing again, I called tech support. Shoulda figured it out myself. First guy first of all had the same hearing problem as the last technician I spoke to, in that it took me 3 tries before he accepted that yes, Dell technician who troubleshoots networking problems on a daily basis does have a wireless router, does have it turned on, and does have it in the next room, well in range of the card that is trying to look for it. All I wanted to know was the one thing he either didn't know how or didn't want to tell me–was there a switch or something on the back of the bloody machine to turn the card on manually, or is there a similar command via the keyboard to do so as there is in laptops? He finally at least gets me over to the wireless department, and the girl on the other end actually has a brain. And is using it. If it wasn't against the rules, I'd of done my own troubleshooting at work when I went in tomorrow… there, I'd at least have access to the same things these people do, and could have found the answer in probably 45 seconds, instead of 45 minutes and 2 technicians. Move on, now, to what I have to get done so I can actually get the antivirus software I'm using set up on my other computer. First requires actually getting the password from Sympatico for my current email address, so I can resurrect a really, really old one I haven't used since I moved out of Pembroke nearly a year ago. Now, Sympatico uses Microsoft's hotmail interface–so yes, a uber craptastic service to be sure–to manage their web interface for all things email. So in order to change, create or delete email addresses, I have to log into that craptastic interface. Not an altogether too thrilling experience, to say the least. But, I do it anyway, because for reasons beyond my control, I have to. So I enter my email address, and move onto the next screen to enter my password. And it sits there, loading… and loading… and loading… then shows me the logout screen… then sits there loading… and loading… and loading… eventually, I just said screw it, and closed the window. I can think of a lot of things I'd like to do on an unplanned but certainly not unwelcome night off. One of those is not deal with the idiocy of people I have no choice but to trust to keep methods of accessing services I pay for from going tits up. So instead, I shall go drop in on an RPG I haven't played in forever. I'll curse at the evil that is Hotmail, and the stupidity that is Sympatico's decision to join forces with Microsoft, later. For the next hour or so, I'm planning to have fun. Or something.

James 3, Microsoft 0.

And all because of a little CD HP didn't send me. Round 1, external HD goes on the blink. Or so I thought. Turns out Windows just decided it suddenly didn't know what it was. Well, after getting frustrated with that, I decided to go right on ahead and start following these instructions figuring, y'know–it isn't working anyway so how much more can I possibly screw it up? Turns out that fixed it, at least temporarily. But, about… oh I wanna say 3 weeks later, it went kerpoof again. And, in the attempt to see what flopped this time, Windows seemingly forgot where it put the *internal* HD. Brilliant. So, it continuously went through the endless loop of startup, logoff, shutdown, restart. And it decided to play the welcome and logging off sounds repeatedly as it went through, indicating it *could* find at least part of the OS–really, really, anoying… I turned off the speakers after a bit. I screwed with it a bit, then decided to bug Trish and see if she had any ideas–she's damn near my equal so far as this crap goes, so it made sense. She dinked around with it on her own, got about as far as I did, and I think we both kinda just… randomly decided the thing was getting repaired. Call it the last act of a desperate couple of techs who don't want to do a complete format. So now, after the repair–for the record, a repair instalation of Windows on a 40 GB HD with 512 MB RAM should *so* not take 2 hours to complete–we're right back where we started. Except with a working machine. And an apparently missing Internet Explorer–easily cured by the fact it didn't touch Firefox. So, this little piece of crap lives another day, giving me time to complete the downloads I'd like to complete, and possibly email myself the crap I wanna get off this machine–I don't plan on keeping this for much longer, since I can get a faster laptop for cheap, even if this thing lasts another 4 years. And with the new email setup now, prompted largely by the near catastrophy I just narrowly avoided, I can actually do that and not run the risk of not being able to pick it up on the other computer–which, for the curious, is now hooked up and just awaiting me to get around to installing the drivers. What can I say? Vista lasted about a minute and a half before the format process kicked in. But that's in another entry when I don't feel quite so geeky and want to. This one's rambling on long enough about things probably only understood by about 2.5 people, with the rest going "Zuh?!?!?!". So now, I go do stuff. Like… clean. Or sleep. Or laundry. Or watch one of the CSI eppisodes I can now access again, thanks to a now fully functioning external HD. Hm. The possibilities are endless. Should they feel that way on a 4-year-old machine that only barely meets the minimum specs?

because 2 weeks is long enough.

Of course, when you do as much in 2 weeks as I've somehow managed to do in *this* 2 weeks, yeah… it's long enough with no updates. Let's see… where best to start. Vell, I could always start with the usual, easy routine of what had me so busy that I couldn't post to the thing. but… well, that'd take up all of about a sentence. 'Cuz, well, when the highlight of your little bit of time away is getting absolutely soked beyond all repair at the ex, there's not that much of an essay to be written about it. Not that it wasn't still fun–anything that results in making Trish's poor husband nearly lose it is entertainment for me. I'm sorry, was that… um, too mean? Ah well, whatcha gonna do? I'm gonna… well, I guess I'm gonna sit here at my desk and wait for a call. That's what I'm gonna do. And… curse the people for whom I work for stiffing me on a computer. Y'see, I took one of these, customised the absolute hell out of it, threw in a few fancy toys just so I have something to do when I'm bored, and had it shipped to my apartment. Where it promptly wouldn't turn on. I figured it'd be the mobo or power supply, but… eh, I got the max on warranty, so I was gonna use it to the fullest. fortunately mister probably outsourced technician from India agreed with me, so it got set up for a return real fast. And will be returned in… about… um… oh, 5-10 days. Not that it bothers me all that much; everything else works. It's currently sitting in my room right now, hooked up to my ever faithful but still slowly dying laptop. Which makes it sound a whole hell of a lot meaner than it actually is. Not that it wasn't mean when I got it… but… eh, that was like 3-4 years ago. It's a kitten now, in comparison to the potential monsterness of some fo today's systems. and the monsterness of the one currently, um, not working. Stupid computers. If it wasn't for the fact their breaking keeps me employed… okay, I'm over it. And now back to our regularly scheduled taking of calls. Which… just for the record, I haven't actually done since I got off lunch. Granted that was 10 minutes ago. But still. When I get home, and if I don't forget, I have politically motivated pictures to display. And a picture that should have been a bit more threatening than it actually is. Not that I'd know anything about picture quality–I'm going by the opinion of the girl holding the camera. Surprisingly, I'll trust her opinion on a lot of things before most people's. Setting myself up for difficulties? We shall see. Granted she *is* family, but so far… she and I are proving to be exceptions to the family rule. In just about every category. They hate it. I love it. It's all good. And… that's why they hardly call me. But, y'know, you don't hear me complaining about that one. If you ever do, please shoot me.

A smattering of update.

Because I only have a couple minutes before my shift starts.

My late birthday present, one hell of a computer, should be shipping today. It's about time.

Apparently, the storm we got yesterday took out my internet service, and Sympatico decided to conveniently state there were no service outages in the area. Disproven. That didn't take long.

For the record, when dealing with internet issues, it so should not take over 24 hours to solve. Of course, the only reason it did was because I only bothered to sit down and fight with it just before I had to go to work yesterday–also shitty, but it's a paycheck.

Completely and totally not related in any way, shape or form to… um, anything else in this post. Not that this post has any actual point to it as it is, but oh well. Oh my. Identical twins is kinda funky enough. But 4? Freakin' 4? Well, could be more unusual I guess.

And I have managed to make writing this entry last past my having taken my first call. Suhweet. I think.

It should be legal to show up to work naked.

According to certain forecasts, it's upwards of 33 degrees C outside right now. Which, ordinarily, wouldn't be unexpected. Except it's 6:00 PM for crying out loud. And by the time I get off work tomorrow morning, it's supposed to still feel like 30 degrees out there. And to that, all I can say is… oh. Crap. Take your clothes off and the first 2 layers of skin and tell me if you still feel warm. On the bright side, there's at least a breeze out there. This bit of optimism is dampened slightly, though, by the fact that said breeze is not exactly what I'd call cool. If anyone wants to convert this to that stupid system the US uses, go nuts. Just don't tell me if you do–33 degrees C almost makes me wanna cry as it is. I don't need to hear a higher number.

There goes another one.

You can thank Lindsay Lohan for answering my question. She has decided cellebrity stupidity deserves its own category, after this latest Hilton immitation. Maybe I'm wrong, but methinks 2007 is the year of the moron. Folks, this is why you see those shows that strongly advertise don't try this at home–if you're an average joe, it's irresponsible and you probably wind up in a whole huge lot of oh shit. If you're… oh, I dunno, Lindsay, you wind up with a slap on the wrist. And a jail sentence that's more like a stay at a luxurious hotel. Oh, wait, wrong dits. Moving on.

Update:

Looks like they found drugs on her, too, which she's promptly said aren't hers. Yup, I believe you. Honest.

Things I didn't know: She's a year older than me?

I practically grew up watching 'Full House'. Well, okay, so I can't think of anyone my age who didn't. But even so, I had no idea Jodie Sweetin was pretty much my age. And… already, she's been married twice, adicted to meth, and… um, God only knows what else. That's the cellebrity life for you, I guess–just ask Britney. Hm, I wonder… do those two talk?

Somebody skipped out on Common Sense 101.

After an Applebee's restaurant accidentally served a 2-year-old a margarita, all the management pretty much said about it was "We're sure it was accidental.". Of course, serving the two in identical containers, you'd think they'd have, you know, expected the mistake to be made eventually. To this, though… I just have one very tiny little question. Which is the more ridiculous? That they were stupid enough to use identical containers in the first place, or that it took something like that to happen before they realized, oh yeah–there's the distinct possibility you could wind up giving a kid alcohol. Inquiring minds want to know. Good call, Kim–people capable of that level of moronicness are beneath just about everyone. I strongly recommend Mcdonalds… the food's not as good, but they don't serve alcohol.

So um... where's the problem?

Aboriginal bands have taken up arms against the almighty coffee chain for an admitedly stupid prank/joke thing pulled by one of its staff in an Alberta restaurant. Namely, taping a sign to the drive through window that said "No drunken indians allowed.". Now, being part indian, and a *huge* fan of the place–they make damn good coffee and it's on the way to wherever–I just have to ask… what's the problem? Have you *seen* my family? I'd tape that sign up too–and mean it. Throw coffee at certain family members and they're strung like nothing else. Mix alcohol? I'd be leaving the room. Really, really quickly. As in, cancel the vacation in Hawaii. I want my sanity back. But… hey, at least we admit we're on some kind of natural crack. Who needs the peace pipe?

Hang on a minute. People... actually do that?

I've heard a hell of a lot of stupid crap lately, but… um, this takes the freaking cake. I'm sorry, but… a water pipe? A freaking water pipe? I understand it's an African idea/tradition/whatever, but… a water pipe? Really, that's gotta come close to people who find new ways to do crack. I'm not a smoker, but methinks I'd start before I thought about giving that a try. Kinda reminds me of a bong party without the weed. Not that I've been to one, but who's counting? Ridiculous, moronic, guaranteed to kill ya… no wonder it's becoming popular in the western world. Now confirming: 7 out of 10 people are idiots.

Well, I wasn't meaning for that prediction to come true.

When me and Trish decided on the weekend gas would hit $2 by summer's end, I wasn't actually being serious. Well, okay, so I'm hardly ever being serious. But apparently someone thought I was making an exception. Oh. My. Freaking. Lord. Thank the gods I don't drive. When I checked on this article earlier, there was reports of upwards of $1.25 in places. Per liter. I dunno… buy a coffee or buy enough gas to at least get yourself home. Which shall we pick? … That's a good question. Someone tell me when we have an answer. In the meantime, I'll enjoy public transit. Has it really gotten that bad?

Update:

There's a nasty rumor going around that it hit $1.27 in Vancouver this afternoon. Oh. Shite.

Hello, legal quicksand.

And people wonder why I have an interest in law. Tech Crunch, who I read more for the snark than the news about startup businesses/websites, is getting slapped with a DMCA takedown notice for an article it posted yesterday about the CEO of rivals.com, a sports website. Specificly, the common opinion that that particular site's partnership with Yahoo would go south just based on the fact the CEO's in some hotness waterness. And now there's the possibility, as remote as it is and as amusing as the situation is, that they'll end up sued for it. Of course, that having been said, I see a long list of takedown notices in this lawyer's future. Starting with TechCrunch, and ending with TechDirt for this article. Oops, guess they'll be suing me, too. Oh damn. Let me know when I should be concerned.

Getting things done on my own schedule could be a bad thing.

I tend to take my time doing it. Example: it's quarter after 11 and I'm blogging. Meanwhile, there be dishes in the sink, vacuuming that needs doing, and eventually, garbage that needs to be going out. Could be an all day event at this rate. But at least I can drown out the neighbors doing it. Yay for decent music! … I have too much time on my hands. Somebody stop me.

Hey look, an update!

There's a whole hell of a lot to update yall on, and I have no idea when my next call's coming in, so let's see how much I can cram into a small piece of downtime.

*****************

I never noticed teenagers were quite that whiny when I was one. And, well, I know for a fact I wasn't the slightest–I was too busy not really caring. I bused to work last week, like I almost always do, and wouldn't you know, some chick decided to pick that particular night to complain about the bus schedule, and how the bus was taking too long to get here. Keeping in mind it was about 20 minutes at most. Now, just for comparison, had it been, say, sunday–or, say, good friday (rant on that one to come later)–there'd of been an hour, count it, an hour, between buses going where she needed to be. And I, personally, did *not* want to listen to her cry about it for any longer than I absolutely under any circumstance had to. It was bad enough the bus she was taking just so happened to be the bus I was taking. First thing that came to mind: call a wambulance. I run that route daily–get over it. I did.

*****************

Okay, next up. Parents who want to name their daughter 'Metallica' (link to come when I get back to the computer that has it)? What. The. Fuck.?!?! I'm sorry, but um, ignoring the fact that's almost off the wall as naming your kid 'Legacy' (I've seen it), their excuse for doing it is pretty flimsy. "The name suits her" and "There's already someone with that for a middle name" wouldn't fly with me. It doesn't make sense… it's like me saying I should be allowed to let my 6-year-old drive because people do it in Texas. And your point, exactly, would be… what? One jumps off a bridge, they all jump off? News flash, folks. "Because they're doing it" is what gets kids to smoke. I almost question their parenting skills at this point.

*****************

Why, oh why, dear lord, do you insist on surrounding me with idiots? It's just not fair. People in Ottawa have got to learn what "I'm blind, not an invalid" means. No, fellow passengers who apparently don't know better, "I know where I'm going" does not mean "Please, grab me by the arm and attempt to drag me off the bus". My trip home on Friday morning velry nearly resulted in someone losing their arm because, put plainly and simply, they didn't listen. I don't like people who don't listen. They make my head do hurty things. Hurty things are bad for me.

*****************

It's April. It's baseball season. It should not be raining on Tuesday, snowing on friday, and freezing most the week. Spring has sprung, for crying out loud. Winter's on vacation. Extended. Preferably permanently. People get all uptight about global warming, I say bring it on. No freezing while waiting for buses. Suh. Weet. How can anyone be upset with that? You're all on crack, you are. All of you. I know none of you. None. Environmental issues be damned. I'm sick of freezing. MWA!

*****************

Disclaimer: If you buy any of this crapola, you belong in the category of moron. I will personally make sure you get there. And send a public farewell with you.

I feel so devalued right now.

Apparently, by 2010 I could be making about as much as that moron at Tim Horton's who, after taking your coffee order for the fifth time, still gives you the wrong one–I live in Ottawa. There are a *lot* of those. That's the plan, anyway, according to our oh so generous provincial government. It's somewhat… depressing to think in a couple years, what I'm doing is gonna be worth just slightly more than burger flipping. I've been living in the wrong province for all these years, that's it.

Explanation:

The link to Tim Horton's is for those of you south of the border who're going "What the fluff?" Think Starbucks, only better and cheaper.

Record... warmest? Wha?

This winter was the warmest on record? really? Someone then explain why it is I still froze my rear off all winter? … And today?

The media's stating the obvious yet again.

Surprise. If you work more, you'll spend less time with your family. Apparently, Statistics Canada is just finding that out now. And of course, now it's headline news. Sorry folks, but I coulda told you that and I've only actually had a job for 2 months. It's not a 9-5 world anymore, folks. Hell, it's very near a 24/7 world. When I leave here at the end of an 8:00 shift, the place is still packed. It'll stay that way usually until 11, then everyone but the overnight crew takes off. And we do it again in the morning. If I had family here who wasn't an uncle who's only borrowing my place for a place to crash, they'd shoot me for how much time I don't spend actually home and awake. And yet, people who look for trends like this professionally are just drawing that conclusion now. I worry for these people. I really do.

I knew working at Dell would be bad for me.

Tonight went well enough that I 1: had lots of free time during my shift, 2: got off my shift on time for a change, and 3: had time to kill afterwards while waiting for people to get done so a rather large group of us could get a ride home–by the way, fitting 5 people in the back of one supervisor's car does not a comfortable ride make. Just so you're aware. So, I took half an hour of said time to kill, and finally went and bought my late Christmas present from me to me. And then I decided I needed an early birthday present, so took real good care of that, too. That small situation remedied, I can now rest easy tonight, knowing both occasions have been selfishly provided for. Which… just means I'll have to do more shopping when my birthday comes around. Gotta buy early for next Christmas, you know.

I'd be insulted too, but for a different reason.

A fast food group is up in arms about Kevin Federline's participating in an ad campaign for an insurance company, playing the part of a fast food worker day dreaming about starring in a music video. Now, I can understand how it is they could perhaps see that as being a tiny bit insulting, I mean, it's implying that everyone who works there would rather be doing anything but that, right? But… honestly? I think I'd be more insulted by the fact it's Kevin Federline doing the acting. The guy can't act… that's such a truth. The guy can't sing… that's a more obvious truth. Even the insurance company says if anyone's being made fun of here, it's Federline. At which point I silently snicker and move on to the next article, and try to keep a straight face while taking this call. That's the hardest part…

Oh my freaking cold...

-21 degrees out there right now, according to the weather network. I tend not to question the weather network all that much when it gets to be that extreme. Even if they're off by a couple degrees… freaking cold is still freaking cold. And I have to walk in that! Fortunately I get to spend an hour or so on the bus… but I have to walk in that! It's cold! It's inhuman! I want my mommy! Okay I'm over it now. Now to finish getting ready for work.

Apparently I have a house guest.

It would seem, for the next 6 weeks or so starting tonight, my apartment will again become a crash pad. This time, though, at least it's for a decent reason–my uncle's taking a course and, to be nice about it, there's no way in hell he's driving 1.5 hours here and back for it on a daily basis. Hopefully he can get used to a sofa… 'cuz the place definitely isn't geared for more than one person, unless said more than one person is a significant other. Ah well, he knew it was coming and wants to do it anyway. The poor fool…

I've caught up to my schedule!

Proof that I can be ready and out the door in an hour or less. I ended up getting mobile by about 4:30, and after discovering I actually won't be able to take what I'd originally planned for lunch (those little soup thermases are awesome, but small), I was surprisingly ready and gone by about 5:30. Meant I missed the bus I usually catch to get myself to my transfer stop, but the stop I get picked up from has 'em going by every couple minutes so that wasn't too much of a stretch… for once. My day, which usually starts at 3:30, is no longer getting ahead of me. Thank the gods–that would have been embarrassing if I cared. And now, I go blog browsing for the last, like, 5 minutes of break.

Does somebody maybe kinda wanna tell me why?

Okay, so… I can understand older people wanting to at least look younger. But when your 30 years old, or thereabouts, it *probably* isn't a good idea to be trying to make yourself look good with your hair done up in pink elastics. At least, not to the extent where you're trying to rival some of my cousins. Sure, you can make yourself look younger… but… 6? Seriously? Even for Pembroke that's overdoing it me thinks.

I don't think a PR man will help you, Michael.

Of course, he's still more than welcome to give it a try, don't get me wrong. I just don't expect it to do much, except maybe put the PR man's reputation at risk. Although, I do like this comment.

He's Jewish. He's not anti-Semitic at all.

Yes, because Gewish folks aren't capable of it, right? Okay, never mind. Even if there was help for him, with a comment like that, you have to wonder if maybe there's not a chance in hell of this particular PR person saving his rear anyway.

The headlines are doing better than the previews!

I don't think I've actually seen a preview for Borat yet, but so far, between an internet cellebrity suing because he thinks the plot was stolen from him and a couple frat boys deciding to anonymously sue because of an apparent drunken appearance they made in the movie, it almost makes me wanna take a huge chance and go see it. Almost. Except I'm still not convinced it's entirely all that funny. Stupid, perhaps. Maybe a little amusing. But if I see it at all, it sure as hell won't be in theaters. Unless someone changes my mind. Not that I see that one happening. In the meantime, though, maybe these headlines will keep coming up and before long all the good parts of the movie will have made news, and I won't have to see it.

Whole new meaning to public discipline.

India is a fine example of where judgement by one's peers goes a lot further than the legal system. Police wouldn't arrest a man for raping his neighbour, who was deaf and mute, because she couldn't actually make a case against him. They claimed to be still investigating on their own, but couldn't do anything about it until proof was found that she was actually raped. So, the village where it happened took matters into their own hands, and their elders apparently decided the man was guilty. Couldn't very well toss his ass in jail, but they had to do something, no? Enter the publlic humiliation phase. He was publicly slapped 51 times for his offense. Suddenly, I'm guessing he's really wishing he'd been arrested.

Suddenly, the US's former defense minister seems inteligent.

Well, on the one hand, this one knows where to look for them ever so elusive weapons of mass destruction. On the other hand, though have you seen the possible sources? I dunno, I'm just waiting for the first time a hacker from Britain actually pulls something off on the US under the watch of this nutjob, if it's actually confirmed he'll be taking over as defense minister. Or secretary. Or whatever the hell they're calling it now. We'll be hearing about the need to topple Britain's current government next, looking for them damn WMD's. Oh, the idioticness of it all!

And amidst all that stupidity, something somewhat positive, if a little idiotic in itself.

I have discovered the reason for it taking a week for me to actually get a hold of something that wasn't someone's voicemail. One HR person I'm to get in touch with was, in fact, on vacation, or… something of the sort. The other? Well, see, she was transfered to Edmonton, and the girl who was taking over for her apparently dropped the ball, or that's the impression I got, anyway. So the HR person who didn't get transfered finally called me back, and is probably going to end up having a conversation with her… yay people in charge! Or… something. So I might actually get somewhere before 2007 is over. Possibly. My opinion regarding relying on other people, however, remains unchanged.

How many people called it a train wreck?

I didn't figure it'd last long, and I was right. Not even 2 months after giving birth to number 2, miss Britney has apparently smartened up and, in an attempt at salvaging what's left of her image, she's ditching the moron. Some would say it's about time. On the other hand, though, will it do her any good? Um, probably not. She stunk before, and now, well, now she just stinks with 2 kids and a deadbeat. And his attempts at being a bigshot can't be helping her, either. This girl gives people my age a bad name.

Will the real fake Borat please stand up?

Apparently, someone liked the idea behind the movie Borat, which is apparently supposed to be quite funny. Funny enough, perhaps, that an internet celebrity (is there really such a thing as a celebrity strictly online?) has decided to claim the idea for the movie was stolen from him. Well, I guess that's one way to draw more attention to the movie itself. I almost wanna see it. But not really. I think that particular news story is more amusing on the whole than probably the movie that sparked it. Maybe someone who's seen it can correct me on that one, but… eh, probably not. Oh well! I'm still amused as hell.

The things we talk about on a Saturday afternoon...

So an IM conversation I was involved in somehow got onto the topic of whether or not a blind man could actually own a car. How that happened, or why, is still anyone's guess. But, in doing so, I discovered something perhaps too glaringly obvious about the system that regulates vehicle ownership up here. There's more goddamn red tape involved than you can shake a stick at. Thank the gods I don't drive…

The next time I decide to eat that much, shoot me.

We went out for dinner tonight, to sorta cellebrate my Dad's birthday and the fact my brother will, in 2 days, be starting his basic training (yay!). And, from about the time the meal was finished to, like… now, I swear if I had anything more to eat I'd explode. Of course, that didn't stop certain individuals from trying to feed me more (I'm looking at you, mom). It's amusing, in a way, though. I think everyone who was there ended up not finishing what they ordered. So for about 10-15 minutes, we were all taking turns passing what was left from one person to the next. Not that it was accomplishing anything. And then, of course, they just had to go bring out the birthday cake. Did I mention by this point at least one of us was borderline exploding? So now, my dad is officially 44, and I am officially 5 pounds heavier. Oh, and, I can guarantee no one in this house will look to snack or anything 'til breakfast. Sunday.

She... didn't... know?

I suppose anything's possible, but… perhaps someone who's been through it can explain to me exactly how it is you *wouldn't* know you were pregnant? I mean, I can see not knowing at first, hence things like pregnancy tests and things, but… after 9 months, still not knowing? Hello? Although, there is something to be found amusing about going to the hospital for abdominal pain and coming back with a kid. Or maybe I'm just twisted.

Halloween spooktale or just plain stupidity?

My day just wouldn't be complete without pointing out the obvious stupidity that seems to congrigate in the unlikeliest of places. In this case, a German court, where apparently you can be a complete and utter idiot and believe in a magical cure for a bad relationship, then sue the nut who thinks she's a witch when it inevitably does not work. Folks, I worry about the inteligence of the people around me. Although, to be blatantly honest, I'm not sure which I find more amusing. The lunatic who thought she was a witch or the idiot who believed her. You be the judge.

So that's what having power feels like.

Somewhere around 1:30 we ended up losing power, for reasons I still don't exactly know. Well, other than that Pembroke/Pettawawa's hydro system sucks royally. So, needless to say, it was not fun when the temperature outside happens to be hovering at or just barely above freezing. I don't know exactly, but hey, if it was snowing, and it was (er, uh, still is), then… I guess freezing or just slightly above it is. Fortunately, much like our last attempt at a snow fall, it didn't stick around. Thank the gods… I'm still too damn lazy to be shoveling. By 4 we were getting pretty close to being fed up with it. And, of course, it was looking more and more like the ever so helpful hydro company estimate would yet again be just a little tiny bit off the mark. By this time now we're tossing around ideas for supper, taking into account the fact we can't cook, microwave, or otherwise put any effort into actually making something–thank you, hydro company. We ended up going out instead, since… well, you know, it beat spending the rest of the evening sitting around a powerless house and slowly freezing. And, as Murphy's law would have it, not even 10 minutes after we get back, we have power again. It almost never fails. Almost, of course, meaning except for, you know, that spell of 24 hours wherein we had no power. *That* was fun. In a… never again kinda way. At least we didn't freeze that time. And now… I suppose I should get back to what I couldn't be doing while we were in the dark. Namely, more house hunting.

Update:

We aren't in any of the named areas, but are right between a couple of them, so I suspect strongly we got hit by this mess.

We... have... snow?

In… October? The second day of autumn? Something just isn't right around here. But yet, step outside, and we will be snowed. I'm not sure I like this. I'm too damn lazy to be shoveling! Damn it all right to hell.

Golden rule of politics: keep your big mouth shut.

And this is why I won't join any particular political party. Offering opinions on a weblog, which as just about anyone knows I do quite frequently, could stand to get you the boot. Hm, a politician grows some balls and he's no longer *really* a politician. Too bad, really. It was starting to show some promis. Ah well, file this under the category of idiots I did not elect. It's amazing the crap you find when you can actually have time to breathe.

Sometimes, you just have to do it to know it's a bad idea.

I should complain about there being nothing particularly blog worthy coming from the morons in newsland more often. People go and pull crap like this then. I dunno. Maybe I'm just uber odd for thinking it, but tongue piercing just begs for all kinds of problems. Why people even bother doing it is really and truely beyond me. Why people bother doing it then think it'll be found sexy is just out of the realm of any possible comprehension. That's a real good way to turn me off, anyway. But, lack of sexyness and outright stupidity aside, I'll bet the real problem behind it doesn't even register with half these people. It can kill you. Or at least make things supremely awkward for you. I dunno. I always thought tongue rings were just a complete waste of your money, and I didn't even have to get one. Does that make me an exception?

It should not be that cold yet!

It's only October 16th. So why, then, am I going outside and nearly losing the feeling in my fingers? Blarg… winter's coming too early! I miss the 30 degrees…

When you think of losing someone, you generally don't think of it happening in the mail.

Unfortunately, as amusing as it is for me, I'd imagine the Ontario family it happened to is outright pissed. A funeral scheduled for this weekend had to be postponed, because the mother it was for was going to be a little late. And I thought my great uncle was the only one who'd actually end up being late to his own funeral. My aunt *did* warn him of that, too… and he was. Gotta love Canada Post.

Oh my.

When they say a political campaign should catch the attention of the voters, I'm… quite sure they didn't think someone would actually take it at skin value. But, I was told once the spanish do have a tendency to take things very… uh, literally. Hey, the public and even the opposition isn't objecting to it, so… whatever works. I wish people around here were that creative sometimes. Of course, that said, some people around here would be shot if they were that creative. For those people, I'm just thankful I can't see.

This should not amuse me as much as it does.

In fact, I should probably be a little frightened. Two of the seven currently recorded searches for this month that lead people here are merijuana, and medical merijuana. I blame it all on this entry. But at least it's not, you know, death to america or something. Apparently the government watches for that in people's blogs now. Oh, uh, oops.

Some people just won't take yes for an answer.

And instead, will take their daughter to another state under the pretense of a shopping trip in order for her to miss the wedding they already objected to. So now, they lose twice; the daughter gets married, and they get charged with kidnapping. And they all lived happily ever after. Eventually.

Well, it would seem I was right.

Completely by accident, though. But, who'd of thought the Washington Post would agree with me? I should mark that down somewhere.

I'm too easily amused.

My brother just tried to make himself look and sound pathetic in an attempt to get my mom, who was heading to the grocery store, to swing by here first so he can grab his smokes out of the car. Perhaps this is just me taking some sort of cruel pleasure in the fact another smoker gets to suffer, but I find this highly amusing. And I'm pretty sure it won't teach him to be any more organized, either. Which… is probably where the amusement comes from. Ah well, I never claimed to make sense.

When they say don't try this at home, they mean it.

And this is exactly why. Note to stupid teenagers everywhere: you are not that good in real life. If you try to reenact a scene from your favourite computer game, you are going to get your ass kicked. Particularly if you openly advertise it by way of a tattoo. It's like I said before. Video/computer games aren't to blame for people doing stupid things because they think they can get away with it. Stupid people who haven't quite got a grasp on reality are. 'Grand Theft Auto' does not make people decide to go out and find a car to steal. Stupidity and general braindeadness does.

Look at that. I was right.

I know I said at least once that if there was a stupidity award, George Bush would get it for sure. Well, there is, and he has. I'd say this should give him an indication so far as about where he stands in the public eye, not just in the US but in other parts of the world–like the northern US, for instance–but any obvious signs you'd think would catch his attention probably went over his head. Funnily enough, the awards do explain why his vice president is the only one who believes Bush's spouting off about there being weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. And he got an award, too.

Take your iTunes store and stuff it.

People really don't buy much from it anyway. They'd much rather have non-DRMed music. Not that it's surprising, really… I mean, it's nothing I haven't criticised before or anything. People like to share their music, whether they buy said music or not. And not everyone has iTunes, they realize that, too, or *wants* to bother with iTunes. So what services like that escentially say is "You can share your music with whoever you want to, as long as they use the same programs you do." Kind of takes away from the "whoever you want to" part of that sentence, methinks. Stupid morons and their thinking crap like that would actually work…

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...

Good mornin' mama! How'd ya like a 14 pound baby keepin' ya company? All I have to say is… OH. MY. GOD.! That's just screaming C-Section. And my guess be so was she. All I think when I read this story is ow, ow, ow, ow, ow…

Technically inept parents... not fun.

I just got done explaining, or trying to explain, the concept of bandwidth to my mother. That was… well, to put it nicely, not a very feel-good endeavor. She doesn't quite the idea that just because your connection to the internet *can* be faster on DSL than it is on dial-up, it isn't gonna feel faster when you've got a network of 3 computers, 1 of which has decided to upload half its hard drive to whoever asks. Well, okay, scratch that. It'll feel faster if you're on that 1 computer. The other 2, though… let's just say my 56k modem goes faster.

And it just so happens that I could use our network as an example. Until about 15 minutes ago, it was crawling at about 1/4 of a turtle's pace on the computers we have up here. So, to prove my point, I had mom go down and turn off my brother's laptop, as I know damn well he's been downloading and/or uploading crap all day in spite of not being home. And, of course, as soon as she'd shut it down, our DSL connection that's supposed to be 1MB/s actually *was* 1MB/s. I love it when demonstrations are so easy to pull off. I just hope she actually caught on… or I'll be explaining the concept to her again the next time he does it. In other words, tomorrow morning when she wants to pay her bills.

Because I know someone from Microsoft reads this.

New definition of 'legal battle', and like everything that's trying to be redefined lately, Microsoft's right in the middle of it. Everyone's already heard about the suing spree Microsoft's going on so far as piracy charges and such goes. Good luck with that, by the way, Billy. And, speaking of Billy Gates and legal battles, Microsoft is getting sued right back. Antitrust issues really suck, don't they just? I hope you win your own cases, folks. You're probably gonna need to to make up for losing this one. And you know you will.

So that's how you catch people's attention.

Who'd of thunk it? Write a post about the shuttle launch on Saturday, and 2 days later, get a visit to the site by someone from NASA. Now *that* is targetted viewing, even if unintentional.

Ever been medicated without your knowledge?

More than a few nurses in an Alberta hospital can certainly answer yes to that one. And one nurse can certainly admit to having actually done it. In fact, she already has. Pled guilty to drugging her co-workers, and a few creditcard offenses on top of that… a regular bundle of trouble, that one. Almost makes ya wanna let her fill your prescription, don't it just?

People are sometimes amusing.

And reasons like this are why I say so. And, of course, why I read that particular blog. But that's beside the point.

I gotta love it when Bush looks stupid all on his own.

It means less work I have to do making him look that way. Not that I have to do any work at all, though, really… I mean, when you get caught in the biggest lie of your career, it tends to do a lot of the making you look stupid for you. And for everyone else. But, he's still clinging to that notion that there were weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, in spite of the fact anyone with an ounce of smarts knows better than that. Except, apparently, those few people who still think Bush was right to bomb the hell out of Iraq. I know I've said it before, but it deserves to be said again. At least once. Possibly twice. Stupid people should be shot.

I take it back.

I'm glad I'm not insured… the payout would kill me. If my brother's irresponsibility doesn't. Okay, so his baking attempt resulted in blackened cookies. Why? 'Tis extremely simple. He did what he's good at, and didn't bother paying attention. He'd rather sit on his rear downstairs instead. So uh, yeah. We won't be sampling his cooking. Ever. *cringe*

I'm not the only one...

Who believes Microsoft is actually a spyware company. Who'd of thunk it?

Why I love saturday mornings.

Me, mom, and my aunt made the ritual trip for breakfast, just for general shooting the shit's sake and well, because we could. As much as I despise family gossip, when we do it it actually gets to be quite… uh… well, amusing. But then, we don't go putting our own twists on things either, so that probably has something to do with it. It's almost a shame it only happened once this week… she's probably the one aunt I can actually say I'm close to. Of course, half of them are just plain irritating and the other half are brainless, and like every family I'm sure, we have that one aunt who's just a manipulative bitch and there's no way in hell around it, so I guess there's a reason this one's the one I'm closest to. LOL

You'd think, my cousins being more my age or there abouts, I'd be closer to them… but most of them have yet to get beyond the stage where a good time equates to driving at speeds somewhere around 3 times the speed limit with something/things of alcoholic nature in the trunk, and well, that just isn't me. I rarely drink for starters, and the last time I checked they don't give a driver's license to a blind man. I do have one cousin who's older than I am that I'm close to, but explaining that one needs an entry all on its own and I'm already way the hell off my original topic.

Anyway, we'd originally planned (mom and I) to just go grab a coffee, and pick up a couple things at the store, seeing as my brother was supposed to have been at work this morning and mom had to drive him in. Then, fortunately my aunt called, warning us to stay put… which was a good thing because, at the same time I was talking to her, mom discovered my brother, in that way the immature tend to do, had at some point while we were asleep left us a note saying he was staying at his girlfriend's place (yes, the bitch who manages to make the english teacher I had in grade 9 look angelic). So needless to say the day didn't exactly get started off on a very positive note. Well, aside from the fact we went for breakfast and he was just a little irritated we didn't invite him… ha. Call it poetic justice. Or revenge. Whatever works. I'm cruel when I haven't had my coffee yet. You've been forewarned. But, anyway, aunts with vehicles meant we still got what we needed to get done out of the way today, so all is right in the world. I've had my coffee, and I do believe in spite of the fact he's an irresponsible moron, my brother may have actually for the first time in his working life gotten to a job on time. Or at least not 15 minutes late. On his own. *marks it in the calendar*

Plans for the rest of the day are still in development… I'm sure I'll have something to actually complain about later. There's talk of ending up at my grandma's at some point today… she always gives me something to bitch about. Hey, I never said I lead an interesting life. But, you're the poor soul who's reading it.

I knew I shoulda stayed in school.

The lucky bastards at a Toronto area highschool are getting a free Bare Naked Ladies concert to start off their school year. Gees, I know it makes me sound old, but if they had crap like that going on when I was in highschool I wouldn't have bothered taking as much time as I could between waking up and showing up for class. I mean, sure I'd of still bitched a fit about it–james is not a morning person. But a free concert and a cup of coffee would more than compensate for that. Because it's free. And it's not class. And… and… damn those Toronto kids! Okay, I'm over it now.

You've got pink slip.

If you weren't worried about checking your email before, now you've got a reason to be. I don't think Radioshack's the first to do it… but ya gotta wonder if it's gonna be a trend? 'Your services are no longer required' is not something I'd really wanna see in my mailbox. You can't tell an email to stuff the job up its ass as easily.

I've been propositioned by a Texan!

Apparently, someone likes the idea of a Canadian love affair. Hm. I dunno how that'd work out, but… suhweet! Okay, I'll stop being so easily amused now.

Hate your job? Send 'em an email bomb!

It's apparently not quite as illegal as some would like you to think. Not in the UK, anyway. I dunno, that's kinda like being sent to your room for clocking your brother one upside the head. Not that I'd know about that one… *innocent smile* Just wait 'til some geek gets himself fired. Shit's gonna hit the fan on this one…

So, comments actually work properly now.

For the longest time, I had absolutely no clue why it is you'd choose the 'remember me' option and, well, the server wouldn't remember you. Until a couple days ago when I discovered, in my infinite (read: lacking) wisdom, I left one very small thing out of the HTML behind the site. Nothing earth shattering, just enough to make it really irritating. Well, anyway. It's been fixed, and I feel stupid. It only took me 8 months to realize it.

And this is the reason why.

Highschool kids have a small pot problem, and now we know why. The stars do it. Okay, it's been proven. Everyone under the age of 20 is not allowed to watch TV anymore. I mean, hell, if an 18-year-old sees an 18-year-old doing it… ah, who am I kidding? They'd do it anyway.

She used to do pop music. Now, she pops out children.

Apparently, miss Britney's second pregnancy was an accident. Hm. I think I heard mutterings of that sort when she had her first one, too. I dunno, does "it just kind of happened" not sound a little too… um… teenagery? Fortunately, she's stopped singing, at least temporarily–having a kid will kind of take away from your time recording songs, touring, and generally irritating people. Unfortunately, she has still not heard of my decree that stupid people are not permitted to breed.

I wanna be a football player if I grow up!

A likely start to a conversation one very unfortunate college football player had with his parent(s) at the age of 6. Who'd of known, just 16 years later, he'd be trying his best Terminator immitation instead? I know it's in the US constitution that it's perfectly alright to carry a gun… but methinks he went just a little tiny bit overboard. Hunting season's in 2 months, Maurice.

I give you, the latest AOL marketting inovation!

But not really. It would appear, however accidentally, everyone's favourite ISP has proven why it is they're loved completely and totally to death. In an act of unrivaled brilliance, they've released some rather… critical user information. While search queries *usually* aren't anything to be worried about, you ever done a search on your own name? Or a phone number you have/had? Or anything like that? Apparently, some of the released information contains just that. Oh, but that's just the beginning. How much information, you ask? Well, okay, so maybe you don't. Since when have I cared? Without compression, there's… something like 2 gigs of information that's gone and oops… been leaked. And this, ladies and gents, is what makes AOL awesome. I don't know why it is we haven't switched over yet. I mean really… what *are* my parents thinking?

I just realised.

In setting up my RSS feeds for this thing, I neglected a comments feed. Wopsydoodles. Ah well, problem solved. I love modern easy to write and easy to screw up technology.

The stuff you by on Ebay amazes me.

And now, thanks to one particularly creative individual, Ebay is becoming the auction center for selling access to a DIGG account. I dunno why people won't just create their own accounts, but apparently, someone would rather sell one. $5 says that account won't work when it's bought. But someone gets money, anyway!

Not how I wanted to spend a friday...

I haven't exactly gotten all that much sleep, at least as yet. But that's perfectly fine… I haven't had time to think about it yet. I'd planned to go to bed about 2:30 this morning, but by 2:25 I got hit with… something. I don't know if it was a DoS attack, a virus, or whatever, but this machine was pretty well hammered, and the network was all kinds of saturated from the resulting… whatever it was that happened. I couldn't even bring up the google homepage. On top of that, the virus scanner I use took a pretty heavy hit, to the point where it needed to be reinstalled. Okay, no problem. Fortunately I had the instalation file on this machine from when I saved my family's computer, so that wasn't *too* much of a headache. Except for the fact I had to run back and forth between computers comparing information and trying to figure out how the hell I pulled it off installing it on the other one. I love Trend Micro's virus scanner, but damn it's a bitch to install. Finally got all that sorted out by about 7:00 this morning, thank the gods of all that is sane, and grabbed a couple hours' snooze–it was damn well deserved! The rest of the day was pretty evenly divided up between dealing with the finer details of the afore mentioned interview with Dell, and kicking the shit out of my web host for being crappy on a day when I coulda been blogging instead of doing what I actually had to get done. And, apparently, we're being hit with another DoS attack again… so if I can't post this freaking thing, we know why. Bastard child that it is. But, all has been averted, at least for now, anyway. Disaster number 54000 of my online life. Sadly, closest thing to a real life I've got right now. At least until I've got me a job… *fingers crossed*

The voices made me do it!

So, earlier today (that would be yesterday) I made brief mention, and bitched a fit at the same time, about our friend Andrea and her non-conviction that's a load of crap. And now, she's choosing to maintain that, in true 1960's/70's bad movie style, "the voices" made her do it. Apparently, voices in her head told her to drown her kids. Yeah, I already went on a take it like a cold-blooded killer kick about it, but… oh well. I don't know what I find more surprising. The jury actually bought that defense, or the judge didn't overturn the virdict. I *really* hope the prosecution plans to appeal. I'm not holding my breath, but… what the hell? I would wonder if the average American citizen is really that stupid, but recent election results tend to reply with a resounding yes before the question's even out of my mouth. Oh good lord no, I've criticised the American people *and* their president in one post! I will never recover from the coming onslaught of hatemail! What ever will I do?

DISCLAIMER

Anything and everything mentioned in this entry is true. Not because I said so, but because anyone who can prove me wrong is smoking something real good, and I want some. If only because there will be no arguing if we're both just as high.

That was all sorts of unfun.

Shortly after my last post to this here thing yesterday, we decided to lose power–thank you, thunder storms. Originally it started alternating between going out, and staying on… with the occasional blink/flicker thing in between. Then it just died for good, and stayed dead for over 24 hours. Not good in 30 degree weather. That's celsius, by the way. We only just got our power back about 8:00 or so, or so I figure anyway, about the same time we were sitting down at a restaurant for supper. This after my aunt and I both spent the day harassing our hydro company for something akin to an answer, or a rough estimate at least, as to when we'd get our power back. Of course, all we got back from them was "We don't know", or the famous "Sometime between tonight and tomorrow". Yeah, helpful. Really. But, I suppose on the up side it was an excuse to kill a couple hours this afternoon in an air conditioned coffee shop. Yay for Tim Horton's restaurants that actually have power! Now, if Pembroke hydro had actually been paying attention to their phone calls last night, this morning, this afternoon, and part of this evening, *all* of the Pembroke/Petawawa area would have probably had power by that time this afternoon. At least, I can always hope, anyway. It gives me something to bitch about if nothing else.

The computer guy strikes again.

And in true idiotic fashion, my brother decided it'd be fun to start downloading music and such without a virus scanner. Oh, sure, Limewire's got a virus scanner built in… but does it do a thing for spyware? Or viruses that *don't* come in through Limewire? Nope… sorry. So, the family computer spent a day or two in completely fucked up land, until I got around to finally fixing the damn thing. The browser they use ended up highjacked,, and pointed to some web page with a dialogue box that popped up warning us we had spyware. And it would keep repeating, and repeating, and repeating… real hard to get things done when you're trying to combat with that, and it was irritating my mother to no end. So, I finally said fuck it and gave them a copy of Trend Micro's virus scanner with built in spyware protection. It works awesome, considering. An hour after I installed the thing on their computer and tweeked the settings a little, I had that machine virtually completely clean. And without a Zango toolbar. That… was surprisingly the worst of it though, at least. Not that it makes me want to hurt the idiot brother any less, but at least now I can concentrate on seeing how many ways I can hurt him rather than how else to fix that computer. I love it when a program is all the difference it takes to solve a problem. Now, perhaps, a sledgehammer will get it through the moron's head… there's a reason we have virus scanners! *screams*

One waste of a Friday night, coming up!

So, we decided to go to a party last night for some person's wedding that I've never even heard of, never mind actually met, and it turned out to be more of a rehearsal for the reception than anything else. The music sucked muchly, there were speeches of all sorts I thought would never end… yeah, it was kind of rediculous. I suppose it wasn't all bad, I mean they did serve alcohol so the speeches weren't quite as irritatingly dull. But yeah, the next time I manage to get talked into going to a wedding thingy thing for someone I don't even know exists, remind me to remind someone to shoot me. That was just… *bad*.

Well, that was a waste of an upgrade.

So, anyone who pays attention to half the crap I put here knows I'm blind, and use a screenreader. Specificly, this screenreader. Well, it just so happens that today they released a new version of said screenreader, and that one has more holes in it than your average program designed by AOL. It probably wouldn't be so bad if I didn't like a lot of the new features they threw into the upgraded version of that program. But, when they break the features that already exist, work perfectly, and I use regularly, it stops being an upgrade. Ah well.. that's why I don't delete older versions of programs for like ever. Yay procrastination at this point.

Webhosty upgrades...

So apparently, the webhost I'm with (see the bottom of the page) is upgrading their database servers to the latest OS, as of… about… 6 minutes ago. Gee, I hope mine wasn't the first to go down, because they just sent out the notice for it 4 minutes ago and I've been using it! Stupid tech guys…

It must be true; it was in the news!

Certain topics of casual conversation present different meanings between men and women. Specificly, men are more likely to assume sexual intent, and do so more quickly, then women. This, at least, according to a study of college-aged students that's just recently been done. Do people not just assume this is a common sense thing? Ah, yes, and I love the generalization, too. Did I mention I despise statistics with a burning passion?

Oh my freaking god!

A wapping 5 posts in one day…. have I gone completely and totally off my rocker?! And I'm no more or less busy today than any other day… granted, 3 of them are quizes and such, but still. Well, okay, so I was more bored than I am most days. Still. 5 posts in 1 day? *1* day! Owww…

First major blogging catastrophy averted!

Of course, there wouldn't have been a catastrophy in the first place if I'd actually, you know, thought what I was doing through last night. But that's just me. So anyway. I was moving the database I use to a new server, which required that I download it from the old one. Well, in doing so, PHPMyAdmin decided it would screw up my backup of the database. And of course, stupid little old me didn't think to set up the new database before deleting the old one, figuring, you know, the backup is stable enough it'll work. Well, Murphy's law dropped by to say hello, and anything that could go wrong… did. So, I spent half an hour cursing Murphy's law last night, and cursing PHPMyAdmin, and 5 minutes slapping together a script that would prevent me from being stupid again. I'm no PHP expert, mind you, but it works! So, yes, I say I lost the database but the website appears for the most part to be intact. Well, it turns out that whehn I set this thing up *way* back at the end of January, I was actually thinking. You can faint now. Normally, I'd be the first to jump on the "static pages are bad" bandwagon. But in this case, staticly built pages saved my ass. Each and every entry had its own little HTML file that didn't get squashed when I fucked up the database. And I still had the original template files from when I actually figured out what the hell I was doing with the site, so replacing those wasn't hard. So the better part of the day, meaning up until I started writing this entry, was spent with just me, and the cut/paste commands while I rebuilt the site one tiny little entry at a time. But, with the exception of a few comments on one entry, fortunately the only entry that ever got comments, I think we're all back together, patchwork and all. The moral of the story? Fuck you, Murphy's law. I own you!

Stupid people shouldn't be allowed to breed...

So apparently heavy metal music is to be credited for saving some 20-year-old's life after he was hit by a train. What he was even doing on the tracks is anyone's guess but no one ever said these people were very bright–hell, they listen to heavy metal. He made the news, so I guess it wasn't a complete and total uselessly stupid act. Was probably what he was aiming for anyway. When interviewed, his basic reaction to it was "Dood. I was just hit by a train." Uh. Dood. You're a fucking idiot.

4:30 Randomness

Okay so amidst being bored, I realised just out of completely and absolutely nowhere, that on average I forget about close to 3 birthdays per month. That's
just wrong. Well, easy solution… happy birthday to whoever I haven't said happy birthday to yet this month! Ah, staying awake until damn near 5:00 in
the morning is a good time.

I just realised...

… I have absolutely no life whatsoever. Well, aside from that whole looking for work thing. This is evidenced by the fact that I've been roleplaying, in one fashion or another, for upwards of… 3 or 4 years now. Ever since my last year of highschool, anyway. God, I'm pathetic. But it's fun!

Urge to pull someone's hair out... rising...

Okay, so I decide to finally make an email address on this server serve as my primary one, because well, I'm insanely tired of sympatico. Logical choice, you'd think. And you'd be right… usually. But, the day I decide to do it is the day they break their servers. So, while I can send email from my primary address, I can't receive email on my primary address. Kind of makes the whole idea of a primary address useless, don't it though? They eventually got it
fixed… a whole 36 hours after they were supposed to. It's a real good thing I'm not in business… that might verry well just piss me off. Oh, wait… it did.

My Life is A Drama Free Zone

I didn't want to see spring until August anyway.

Tool outages are your friend.

I think winter's getting to someone...

Is today the national day of malware or something?

Now there's a random search woops.

I can haz no webmessengerz?

If you're stuck on hold, I'm sorry.

So yesterday was apparently senior citizens' day?

Bad things happen when you can't sleep.

I hate to say I told you so, but...

December roughly translated is holy crap it's busy?

This is where I check out.

Why I don't go by 'Jim'.

Oh. My. Lord.

You know what they say about rules...

Would *you* pay to tube?

Maybe I live on the wrong side of the border to understand, but...

Wherein my opinion of relying on other people gets more confirmation it doesn't need.

So there's this idiot brother...

My Facebook resistance has gone right to hell.

Dell: we'll help you with your porn, too.

Can we vote for a law against morons in power now?

I get to do nothing for 4 more hours. Plus breaks.

Should I be worried...?

BRAINS!!!!!!!

Even Dell technicians hate Dell technicians. And Sympatico, and Microsoft, and...

James 3, Microsoft 0.

because 2 weeks is long enough.

A smattering of update.

It should be legal to show up to work naked.

There goes another one.

Update:

Things I didn't know: She's a year older than me?

Somebody skipped out on Common Sense 101.

So um... where's the problem?

Hang on a minute. People... actually do that?

Well, I wasn't meaning for *that* prediction to come true.

Update:

Hello, legal quicksand.

Getting things done on my own schedule could be a bad thing.

Hey look, an update!

I feel so devalued right now.

Explanation:

Record... warmest? Wha?

The media's stating the obvious yet again.

I knew working at Dell would be bad for me.

I'd be insulted too, but for a different reason.

Oh my freaking cold...

Apparently I have a house guest.

I've caught up to my schedule!

Does somebody maybe kinda wanna tell me why?

I don't think a PR man will help you, Michael.

The headlines are doing better than the previews!

Whole new meaning to public discipline.

Suddenly, the US's former defense minister seems inteligent.

And amidst all that stupidity, something somewhat positive, if a little idiotic in itself.

How many people called it a train wreck?

Will the real fake Borat please stand up?

The things we talk about on a Saturday afternoon...

The next time I decide to eat that much, shoot me.

She... didn't... know?

Halloween spooktale or just plain stupidity?

So that's what having power feels like.

Update:

We... have... snow?

Golden rule of politics: keep your big mouth shut.

Sometimes, you just have to do it to know it's a bad idea.

It should not *be* that cold yet!

When you think of losing someone, you generally don't think of it happening in the mail.

Oh my.

This should not amuse me as much as it does.

Some people just won't take yes for an answer.

Well, it would seem I was right.

I'm too easily amused.

When they say don't try this at home, they mean it.

Look at that. I was right.

Take your iTunes store and stuff it.

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...

Technically inept parents... not fun.

Would you pay to tube?

Well, I wasn't meaning for that prediction to come true.

It should not be that cold yet!

So that's how you catch people's attention.

DISCLAIMER